Of course being the start of the year I have been doing some thinking about my goals, one of them is that I want to be a sporty / fit kind of person. I chose a “feeling goal” rather than a measurable goal because it just works better for me. ANYWAY. This Sunday morning I got out of bed excited to go on a run, and while I was out there I learned a lot.
I learnt that moving my body feels good. That I have a while to go before my body gets used to having more asked of it. That the fresh morning air feels so good in my lungs. And that outside of my comfort zone is where I find myself.
Anxiety and nervousness has been a running theme throughout my life, and as far as I have come from being a painfully shy girl to the life of the party at times, I am still so afraid. Of what? Am I more afraid of the world, or afraid of myself?
Here is another “feeling goal” that I’ve set myself for 2018: be a creator. I want to write and DIY and film and sing, all of it! And I want to do it without judging myself. I want my creativity to be about PLAYING again, not shame! And beyond the fear of being seen there is a beautiful reality where my art is a part of my life again, helping things make sense and bridging the gap between my inner world and the real world.
So, in that spirit I sat down and wrote this post. Its not much, but its me right now. I am going to keep writing this year and I’m really excited to share all of this with you. For now, I hope you are having an equally lovely Sunday morning! I am now going to make myself a coffee and watch an episode of Downton Abbey with my knitting before any other household members wake up.
Love ya guts,